Welcome to my world

I know its another Starbucks story, I swear we go other places. So there we were on our once a month ritual- take the 7 year old to the orthodontist to get “1 turn, looks good, and see you in 4 weeks” report.  We did all the usual stuff- then headed for Starbucks as a treat, before we journey back down the 101.  Drive thru, here we come.

After multiple order changes, and a somewhat long line, we ordered- kids hot cocoa- not hot (which is chocolate milk, but don’t tell my 5 year old), a slice of lemon pound cake- they were out of muffins, and my usual, grande, soy chai, no foam.  Whew, glad thats behind us.  Now something odd happens, we wait, and we wait, I can sense the traffic on the 101 growing and growing with every passing minute.

We finally get to the magic window, and she says that’ll be $2.38.  Okay, most of the kids at Starbucks seem pretty intelligent, but this one clearly cannot add. As a believer in being honest- after all my kids are in the car- in the interest of not messing up the universe I ask “are you sure about the amount?”

She says, oh yes, you had to wait so long I’m not charging you for the drinks.  What? Without asking? No complaining, at least I don’t think she could here my kids yelling are we there yet? is it ready yet? the usual impatient shouts from small people.

What a pleasant surprise, this is the kind of stuff a great customer experience is made of……do something unexpected for your customers- even if its only worth $5 and they will remember it….and share it!

When has slowing down ever been a good thing? Ok, I tell my 4 year old to slow down all the time, but she is 4.  I wonder if anybody has told Steve Jobs to slow down, or Apollo Ohno to go a little slower.  I have pondered and thought, under what circumstances it makes sense to slow down on healthcare reform.  For the life of me, I cannot arrive at an answer. It seems like we have been talking about healthcare issues for half my life.  I guess if we slow down long enough the people who really need healthcare reformed will no longer need it or be bankrupt.

If like many Americans, you have worked for a Fortune 500 for your entire career, or you are retired and already on Medicare (the public option) you have no earthly idea what the hell all the fuss is about- you work, some $$ comes out of your paycheck, you go to the Dr. whenever and as often as you please, and somehow it gets paid for.  You probably even know people who have had serious illnesses and its all been covered.  So, what is the problem people?

Try being self employed, working for a start up or a small business, or try being a teacher.  You are in for a very rude awakening. http://bit.ly/9sQs3Q

This story is about my daughter’s teacher, she and her husband are both teachers, highly educated, raising two kids of their own, living an average middle class life, and then Wham. Your husband has cancer, and the benefits you have been paying for only cover 80% of his treatment.  When a bag of chemo gets hung on the stand, you look up and think, that’s another $10,000.

So, yeah, I think we should slow down, because I am sure this is a totally isolated incident that is not playing out anywhere else in America…..ever.  At some point we all have to grow up and stop thinking in terms of how everything affects me (its not all about YOU), and focus on the greater good.  I thought that’s what American’s were made of? At least that’s what I tell my kids, I hope I’m not wrong.

Yep, I saw this too.  Okay, let me get my first rant out of the way- was this a social media nightmare? family nightmare? driver nightmare? company nightmare? Are there social media nightmares without companies and customers- like if a bear shits in the woods and nobody is there to smell it does it stink? I digress…..

This is nearly perfect- resembling a good sitcom script- its the holidays, during hard times, family orders new freezer, delivery truck runs over pet dog- Toot- dead- Merry Christmas to you, Merry Christmas to you.  Almost too good to be true- its a nightmare, or is it? Original story at   http://stevefarnsworth.wordpress.com/

This is not about Steve or his blog, I am confident he provides good service and advice.  BTW, no beefs with Sears, or Peggy and David and how they handled the situation.  My issues go deeper and broader.  So, here you go, read’em and weep.

1.  Drama Queens- why is everything happening in social media a nightmare, a disaster, brand ending event, or your waterloo? I mean really people, unless you put poison in your product (i.e. Tylenol- which you probably took in the last 7 days) I doubt whatever is happening is that dramatic. It might suck, however, your brand will survive. If you do the right thing- see #3.

2.  Deep pockets- is every company ready to give every customer who’s pet gets squished by a delivery truck a free appliance? I don’t think so. And if you do, then I’d like to see the ROI methodology on this.  When companies react to the drama with free stuff they set a precedent they cannot possibly sustain.

3.  Root cause analysis- yes, I’m whipping out some corporate junk from my trunk.  Every company should listen to their customers and understand their issues- what is really going on- in the real world? How do our customer see us? How do our employees treat our customers?  What policies are in place that hinder our employees from taking care of customers? How do we handle escalated issues? And there are more.  If Sears really wants to make the nightmare end, they need to determine how to AVOID other dog squishings, and, just as important, if we do squish another beloved family pet- what should we do? Thus never creating a “social media nightmare”.

4.  Accountability- cheese and crackers, another corporate practice.  If you have a Director of social media or some other fancy title, you must hold folks accountable to the same measures as everyone else.  Translation, if you avoided a “social media disaster” how much revenue was saved? How many customers did you save? How much revenue will be lost of if you do nothing? And last, how much did this “disaster” costs to handle? What is the ROI on handling vs not handling these disasters?

5.  Loud sucking noise- and I don’t mean a black hole. Do not, I repeat, do not get sucked into the world of social media just to “avoid a disaster”.  If you want to hear from your customers, employees or anyone else who experiences your brand, then you should do that. By leveraging social media tools, along with ALL the traditional tools and methods you have at your disposal. You should NOT use social media as your only source of data. And nor should you react to everything you hear in social media.

I want to be clear, I use social media, I like social media, heck, my husband started a social media monitoring company.  What I don’t like, or support is the current scare tactics being used to get companies to engage in social media.  Companies both big and small either want to listen or they don’t, and social media is just another tool to do that.  Yes, it would appear more people can be reached, more quickly these days.  I just don’t buy it- that bottom lines are being significantly impacted by “social media disasters or nightmares”.

My hope, is that companies, big and small will take a new view and interest in what is happening to their customers.  Improving customer experience through organizational excellence and awareness is the single best way to avoid a nightmare or disaster, social or any kind.

So, there I was, just dropped the kids at school, rushing to get to the office, and my brain is saying- must have chai, must have chai.  Recently, in an effort to save cash, I have been my own Barista, skipping my morning visit to Starbucks. Today was an exception, in so many ways.

Sitting 8 cars deep at my local Starbucks drive-thru, I am beginning to think- stupid idea.  We start to move along at a decent clip, but my mood is fading- quickly.  I order my venti soy chai, no foam and move forward.  Thankfully no sales pitch for a muffin or some other expensive add on- part of Starbucks brand I don’t like.

I proceed to the window, it opens, and to my surprise, there is the nicest, happiest young hip dude, I think I have every seen.  He says- “Well, good morning, how are you?”.  Me, gruffly, I’m fine.  ”How are you?” He replies “I am amazing!”.  No joke.

In those 3 simple words, my mood has changed from yucky, to approaching some where near amazing.  He asks me if I have a milk allergy and if I like egg nog.  He offers to make me a sample of egg nog and chai for a new holiday treat.  I always wonder where Starbucks finds these people, but today I didn’t care.  I was just thrilled to have someone make my beloved drink for me, and give me a reason to start my day in a better place- an amazing place.  This is the part of Starbucks brand I love!

You can say what you want about Starbucks- too expensive, too corporate etc..  What every company should realize is they get it.  How you treat your customers defines your brand, plain and simple. Your brand is not your logo, your website, or even your product, it is solely built on how you treat your customers- period.

Starbucks employees from the bottom to the top, from the front lines to the exec’s, have worked hard to create a culture that encourages and really demands customers are treated the Starbucks way.  And today, it was Amazing! Which is why their brand thrives even today in tough times.

This whole H1N1 thing has everybody digging up old school remedies.  Most are common sense, and harmless, however, yesterday I got a new one- unpeeled onions.  Apparently putting an unpeeled onion around the house will “soak up all the bad flu germs” and keep your family healthy.

As a concerned Mom, I forwarded this useful, inexpensive tip to my closest Mom friends.  One responded with- I think I’ll send my son to school with an onion necklace, just to be super sure! Now before anybody calls CPS, she won’t carry through on it, but there are others who might consider this tactic.  After all onions are readily available- the vaccine- not so much.  Trust me, there will be un-intended consequences.

Before you dress up your little one in H1N1 protection gear- onions, consider, how much therapy will be needed down the road from the sheer humiliation.

This got me thinking, sigh, I know, but it happens! Sometimes I think we should not only allow, but require parents to set up a Therapy Fund similar to a 529 college fund.

Just think about it- you, as a parent could make donations for specific events- like a charity:

• $10 from Mom forgot dress up day- you were the only kid not dressed up
• $25 from Dad when he forgot to pick you at school- you thought we forgot you
• $100 from Mom & Dad when we forgot your birthday
• $200 when I made you wear onions around your neck to prevent H1N1
• $300 for when we let you wear that purple and green polka dot dress to Prom
• $250 when you failed your driving test- the first time

And the list would go on until your little one reaches 18. The fund would serve three purposes:

1.  You can relieve your guilt as a parent- cheaper than therapy for you!

2.  Your kid has a ready made list for his/her therapist of all the stuff to work on- saves time later.

3.  Its a Therapy savings account- you don’t have to buck up for it later.

I recently read this article on TechCrunch http://www.techcrunch.com/2009/08/21/microsoft-stores-now-hiring-an-apple-store-genius-is-a-microsoft-store-retail-technical-advisor/ The traditional arguments followed, page after page of comments on both sides of the isle- MS haters and Apple haters going on and on about what it all means……a little too much drama for me.  Here’s how I see it.

The major difference has nothing to do with what each company calls their employees. The major difference is how Apple and MS view their customers in this equation. It would appear from the MS sales pitch, its all about working for MS and getting opportunities for yourself, you’ll have a great career and prosper.  The Apple pitch is about helping people = customers succeed. In the end I am sure MS sees this as a “necessary evil, the old fashioned view of a cost center”. While Apple views customer service as a differentiator. Each of these companies will attract who they want, and everyone will be happy with their roles no matter what they call their employees.  Customers on the other hand will get a very different experience, because the employee’s they hire are motivated by something completely different.

Yep, its that time of year, when JD Power & Associates (always wonder who the associates are?), gives out customer care awards. Every year, we see the likes of T-mobile and Verizon topping the list. This year there is a 3 way tie, interesting.

I always wonder if JD or Verizon for that matter turns around and gives their award to their outsourcer? I’m not just picking on Verizon here, many companies win customer care awards throughout the year, and those companies outsource all or part of their customer care. This information never seems to make the report? Hmmmm…..

As near as I can tell, the outsourcer should get the award, maybe its just me, but Verizon didn’t provide “good” or “great” customer care- they hired a company to do it for them. And let’s face it, having been in many of these discussions, companies don’t embark on an outsourcing initiative to deliver “Zappos-like” customer care. They outsource to cut costs, period, end of discussion.

In this case, Verizon picked an outsourcer, who apparently kicks butt at customer care, lucky for them, nope, lucky for their customers!

Took a few days, to- uh hem, well, you know, do what everyone does post 6 months with a client. Reset, re-program, remind yourself why you did it, and then move on. Focus on the wonderful people you met, even if the overall experience was less than ideal. Make a list of what you learned, and what you will do different next time…..

After 6 months in the bowels of a “Telcom company”, I was reminded what the 80’s were like for “customers”. Swiftly brought back to a time when customers were defined as “subs, deals, connections, circuit #xyz, site address, or that 10 meg”. Spouting more acronyms than the military, making me wonder if some of these folks even know what the heck they are really saying. You’ll need to get a FOC to install the T1’s IP trunks & the 5 meg, on that DS3, POP and the CP….I’m sorry did you just say FOC, to your customer?

This experience made me wonder will the telco’s ever really change their view of “customers”? Do they understand there are actual- real live struggling customers on the other end of their “pipe”? These people run viable businesses, and need good reliable service. Since many of the new telco’s are being led by old school telco leaders, makes you wonder what’s going to change and why would it?

As in any industry, the situation will only change, when it becomes unbearably painful to the bottom line- this is when the changes will occur, and not a moment before.

I challenge all of you to give me an example of a “telco” who is truly focused on its customers and helping support and grow their businesses.